What A Salty Piece Of Shit!

I don't care that I went to go see SALT for free, I want a refund! 

From the beginning of the film, SALT was a slap in the face to summer movie -goers and lovers. I, not even for a minute, believed that any of the tomfoolery laced action on the big screen could have actually happened in real life.

And I know what you're thinking (yes I can read minds), you just don't like Angelina Jolie. Nope, you're wrong. I love Angelina Jolie. I've been a fan since Gia and Girl Interrupted. I have never once gave a damn about the whole Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie vs. The Chin. I have always been Team Angelina, but this is making me think twice. 

It seems to me that maybe the media is over-hyping Ms. Jolie and trying to force feed the bad-ass persona she once had, down our throats to make us forget what might or might not have happened in the past. I'm sick of it. Enough! Enough with the bad ass roles! No more gun slinging, tattooed "tough girl" exterior, and movie kung-fu. I've had it!

Ms. Jolie is 35 years old. Let her do some 35 year old woman shit and leave the bad movies to someone like Megan Fox, who is young and dumb and the perfect actress for movies without substance.

Now I'm not one to spoil a film so there will be no examples as to why I thought the movie was bad. I just wanted to state my opinion and it leave up to my loyal legion to make up their mind as to if they want to go see it or not. 

My rating for this movie is 2 and 1/2 stars out of 5 stars. I'm giving the movie such a high rating because it isn't completely helpless. It does star one of my favorite actors Chiwetel Ejiofor, and there were times when I find myself smiling. One of them being when Ms. Jolie's character FINALLY got rid of that awful blonde hair. 

Rebirth: The Beard

Once every blue moon I would like to talk about a rebirth. I know I should use the word renaissance, but that's too formal and I tend to not give a damn.

So today my rebirth would be on The Beard.

Recently, there has been an influx of beards on the red carpets of Hollywood. The best I've seen so far is Jon Hamm from the show Mad Men.


Now my mom loves this show. I hate it and here's why:
Around the time (and don't worry I'll get to my original point in a second) the show promoting for its first season, the only promo ad was a series of scenes from the show along with the song You Know I'm No Good by Amy Winehouse. So now no matter when I see Jon Hamm I hear boom boom boom ba boom. Every time. Every single time. I hate it!

Although Jon looks damn good with his beard, there are always the whiny people out there that just don't want to accept the fact that men have hair that grow out of their faces. These are also the people that complain about Conan's hair.

Speaking of Conan, does anyone else remember when he grew a beard for the writer's strike? He looked damn good! I tuned in every night to see Conan transform from my 14 year old bratty lab partner into a man. I swear Conan's ratings would have been a lot higher if he had the beard. Maybe Jay could grow one to hide that damn chin. Quick who would win in the battle of the chin: Jay Leno or Jennifer Aniston?

Back to beards.

I think the world is still in shock over that Brad Pitt beard.



That thing had no shape, no form, and no purpose. He claimed it was for a movie role, but I'm almost sure he had already done 12 Monkeys. However, if my lady parts liked Brad Pitt I'm sure I would have still been in mourning, but I liked the beard. So hip hip hooray for the beard. Welcome to your rebirth.

My Favorite Beards of all time: