Sunday, June 5, 2011


It feels like it took me forever to see this movie, but it was so worth the wait. Like I do with every review, I'll tell you right now that I loved it. I loved the action. I loved the acting. I loved the characters. I loved this movie. 

Before I get into why I love this film, I have to give a little bit of the plot away. Erik Lehnsherr is going around the world killing people to avenge the death of his mother. On one of his missions he meets Charles Xavier, who tries his hardest to convince Erik to use his powers for good vs. his normal evil routine. Also during this time, two of the worlds most powerful superpowers are close to the edge of a nuclear war (read a history book if you don't know who these superpowers are!!!) and it is discovered that the instigator in the middle of it all is the same man (also a mutant) who murdered Erik's mother. The CIA recruits Erik and Charles who also recruit a young group of powerful mutants to aid in demolishing the pending nuclear war. Now the group consists of Havok, Mystique, Angel, Hank McCoy (who we all know turns out to be Beast), Banshee, and Darwin.

The story of First Class kind of strays away from majority of anything I've ever learned about the X-Men, but it was very entertaining. I was never once disappointed or bored with what I was watching, because the movie moved at a fast pace. There was only one moment that I felt I had been in the theater forever because so much had happened, but when I checked my phone only an hour had passed. That's how jam packed with action the movie is. 

Now onto the acting. How could I not mention Michael Fassbender? The man is a beast and I love him for it. It's kind of hard to believe that this time two years ago he was only known amongst Euro-indie heads and fangirls (like me because he's sooooo dreamy!), and now the whole world knows who he is. He made the character of Erik Lehnsherr his bitch and played it slightly better than Sir Ian McKellen...Yeah I said it!

Kevin Bacon is in this film too. That alone confirms my belief that bacon does in fact make everything better. Nuff said. 

Now on to the things that I did not like:
  1. Professor Charles Xavier...what the hell is his problem? I have seriously been asking myself this question since I was five years old. Does he not see what the hell is going on? How many times does this fool have to get knocked in the head by the rock of human ignorance before he finally sees? I've always been more of a Magneto fan than a Professor X fan (for obvious reasons), so maybe that's why I can't understand why he is so willing to put his life on the line for mankind. Although the character was well played by James McAvoy, I began to get more and more irritated by him as a whole. For real dude? Bombs dude. BOMBS!!!
  2. January Jones...They had this chick posted all over the place like she was going to be all up and through the movie, but she was maybe in it for all of 10 mins. That of which she did appear I wished she would have kept her mouth closed. Seriously! A model could have done her job and probably would have looked better and done a much better job than she did. Dry ass! LOL! But how the hell would I know? Whenever she was on screen all I kept looking at was that overly padded bra in 60s gear. I kept thinking about how she looked just like the fembots from the Austin Powers films. I just knew that crocked tooth bastard was going to pop out and ask her if she was randy and wanted to shag.
  3. Rose Bryne...Another person that was poorly cast. I like Rose, but why was she there if they were going to stifle her for the complete second half of the movie. I totally forgot she was there until Professor X asked her a question while the X-Men were aboard a plane. I thought oh there she is...what's her name again? Totally forgettable. Such a shame, but for real...what was her character's name?
  4. John F. Kennedy. Why the hell couldn't this man talk? Who the hell says "Cubar"? Boston accents. Ugh!
Aside from the last 4 flubs, this movie definitely isn't Wolverine. Far from it. I hope that this movie erases the memory of the last X-Men fuck up from people's minds. I also hope the loyal legion listens to me when I say go see this film. It's a good one. Trust me. You'll enjoy it and its cameos....

Well that's it. That's my conclusion. That's all I got. I wish I could come up with something more clever, but I've been up since 6am and my eyelids are getting heavy.